From the Editor: Sitting on the other side of the altar rail

Jim Nelson

Being the editor of the Advocate, I find myself on Sunday mornings being on the other side of the altar rail. That is somewhat of a new experience for me. For 18 years I stood in the pulpit of a church and led or helped lead a worship service. Now I sit quietly in the pew and observe.
I am afraid that I have become one of those parishioners that used to drive me crazy. I expect something from the service. Now I realize the church does not exist to satisfy me; that I attend church to worship God, to spend time in God’s presence, and to be in community with other believers as we share our faith in Jesus Christ.But the reality is that if the only reason I attend church is so I can worship God and acknowledge to the world my belief in Jesus; then it really doesn’t matter where I go. Any church will do. Well, almost any; there are some with bad theology we should not lend credence to even by our presence.

You have to admit, though, it is much more gratifying to go to a church that excites you. We should wake up on Sunday morning with a sense of excitement, a sense of anticipation, a sense of wonder. We should feel that today is the day we get to go to church and bask in the glory of God, sing praises to His holy name, and witness to our faith in our Lord and Savior, Jesus. I want to leave feeling challenged to live a better life. I don’t want to just be patted on the back in an “I’m OK, you’re OK” kind of way, nor do I want to be constantly berated and condemned as a sinner.

Some churches I enter I immediately feel the Spirit, the joy, the excitement surrounding the worship service that is about to unfold before us. But, in others I feel depressed, sad, an absence of the Spirit. Sometimes I just want to stand up and yell, and ask, “What are you doing? And, why are you here?” I fear most of them have forgotten.I want everyone to feel what I feel; to know what I know; to have the love of Jesus in their lives. I want everyone to be able to spend time in His presence every day, and to read His Holy Word. I want everyone to strive every day to walk as he would have us walk, yet knowing he will forgive us when we fail. My faith brings me joy, it brings me peace and a sense of contentment. My faith allows me to be satisfied with and to enjoy all that I have, and to not constantly be needing more. My faith helps me to accept life as it comes to me.There have been times recently when I wanted to stand up in the middle of a sermon and question the preacher. Particularly when s/he says something I disagree with or just don’t understand. However, I fear too many preachers and parishioners would find that unsettling.

Occasionally for a Sunday evening service, I would have an “Ask Dr. Jim” night. People could come and ask me any question about scripture or theology and I would give them an answer. Sometimes I would say, “I don’t know.” Sometimes I would say, “It really doesn’t matter.” And sometimes we would enter into a discussion about what we believe deep down. I think those were some of my better sermons, and except for the healing services, some of the better attended ones. Maybe I should start an “Ask Dr. Jim” column. I am sure that would create some discussions. Anyway, if you see me come into your church some Sunday morning, don’t worry. I will control myself. I won’t stand up and start arguing with the preacher. But, I must admit, it would be fun.